


Stupid Sexy Wade

by SluttyHaruka



Series: Comic Sluts [1]
Category: Deadpool (2016), Deadpool (Comics)
Genre: Creampie, F/F, F/M, Femdom, Genderbending, Interrogation, M/M, Missionary Position, Pansexual Character, Riding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-26
Updated: 2016-02-26
Packaged: 2018-05-23 08:46:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6111239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SluttyHaruka/pseuds/SluttyHaruka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a collection of little stories about a stupid sexy meta cutie with a stupid sexy butt. Most of these won’t have a plot or much commonality between them. Maybe Wade will be a woman sometimes. Maybe he will ride some Cable. Maybe there will be a little plot. Maybe you will enjoy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stupid Sexy Wade

The barrel’s intrusion into his mouth muffled his labored grunts. Its bulky shape pushed deep inside, stuffing him full and blowing out his cheeks. His tongue recoiled from the harsh taste of metal, his body jerking as he gagged. It moved in him like...best not to think of that… He felt a latex clad trigger finger press against his chin as the instrument bottomed out in him. His stomach gurgled and, had the circumstances been different, he was sure he would have shit himself. 

The moment he realized that, the weapon pulled away from his face, its owner cringing as she holstered it. His attacker maintained a remarkably cool exterior, taking bullet wounds in stride and squatting over him with perfect poise, but the thought of riding a man who was thinking about defecating was a step too far for her. Attempting to redirect his energies, she procured a sheet of paper from _idontfuckingknow_ and thrust it towards him. 

“Are you sure you haven't seen this man?”

The image was a childish, crayoned in rendering of a stick figure with a line jutting out above its legs and two x’s for eyes with a dotted line trail traced across the sheet of paper to a red figure with a curvy bottom. A beige split in the color seemed to indicate deep, V-shaped butt cleavage. Had it not been for his line of work, the man would have assumed that that the drawing had been created by a deranged youth with a predilection for ejaculating onto rear ends. Fortunately for him, he had the assistance of the sight of a score of his formerly alive peers around him on the pass to indicate otherwise. It was really the work of a deranged youth in the shape of a adult female burn victim in a funky red suit with two guns and a predilection for her rear end getting glazed.

The mutant clapped her hands together, interlacing her fingers, and cocked her head as she cooed dramatically. “People never get the real me so quickly!” Continuing to bounce on his pelvis, the sound of wet slaps subtly echoing off the cars on either side of them, she leaned back towards him and whispered, “ _are you a psychic?_ Cause, if you are, it would be a big help if you could tell me where my girl is and how hard I skull fuck Francis!”

The goon’s expression was distant, glazed over. His head within the wool mask he wore was itchy, burning up from a mixture of nausea and passion. Her rump rhythmically connected with his body, her moist canal greedily sucking him up into her, encouraging him to knock her cervix. It became clear to her after having taken him to the base several times that such a sensation wasn't in the cards with this guy. Oh, well, at least he was reasonably thick which was an endearing quality in its own right.

Her brand of torture was sure to get him spewing out what she needed without resorting to messy, triggering scenes of gore. The x-boys and tumblr would never let her live that shit down. The problem, though, was that this guy _really was thick_ and the longer she rocked his piece, the more annoyed she became. Here she was, slaving over his ~~average~~ moderately impressive cock, and all he could do was gape his fucking mouth and drool all over himself. Her brow twitched as her hand hovered over her one of her _currently_ sheathed blades.

“Are you holding out on me?! You are so mean! How am I supposed to enjoy slicing your fucking head off now?” 

Wade huffed, tempted to skewer his rectum with her fucking fist, her hips thudding harder against his lap, sending ripples across her thick cake. Latex squeaked as her fingers dug into her palm. Her hungry cunny continued her good works, though, unphased. She repeatedly swallowed up his pecker, milking him. His eyes widened at the threat as she fumed (before rolling back in his head again). She missed it, although it wasn't very likely she would have noticed if she had been looking at him.

“Are you calling me stupid?” Her brow furrowed as she turned back towards her gagged prey, blank white eyes emoting through changes in her facial expression her sudden, euphoric realization. “Oh, no, I won't accept defeat so easily.” Connecting with his body on the down stroke, they were treated to the unmistakable sound of gas being expelled, her labia vibrating around his cock. “Ooh, lovely. 

“I have a much better way of getting you to talk! So how about it, chum? You don't mind if I take this interrogation to the next level, do you?” More drool and a long groan were all he could manage. “ _Ooooooh_ , can’t fucking stand it when people don't respond. It is so goddamn rude. That’s it! Time for no mercy mode.”

Leaning on his thighs for support, she fully outstretched her legs in an even split and gave him a final wink before beginning to slam her hips on him. The wet thuds intensified in sound and wetness, droplets of feminine fluid spraying across his form with each collision. Soon, it was raining. Wade shuddered as her ejaculate erupted from her little spout like a fire hose, drenching both their semi clothed bodies in equal measure. Her bubbly ass jiggled violently, a perfect apple in a near fluid like form. 

He was mesmerized by it as his cum churned in his sack. His entire joystick felt like it was melting into butter, even while her thick thighs battered his pelvis. Though she was by no means a plump woman (actually tending more towards muscular with just a lot going on in the buttocks region), she was shockingly heavy, riding him like a bucking bronco in reverse. His pants rode further down his hairy thighs as she pounded him into the asphalt. And she couldn't be more thrilled to do so.

“Wow, this isn't uncomfortable at all!” she giggled, giving her burning clit a rub a dub dub. “I must have been a gymnast in this continuity. Mmm, I should be a woman more often.”

With no frame of reference for her babble, the goon lost himself in the dueling sensation of pain and pleasure. She clearly worked her bitch button well, because the fleshy squeeze on his cock became more taut, rippling along his length. Her hips did not stop thrusting as she shook, maintaining the sweet friction between their bodies as she coaxed out his nut. Oddball though she was, her skill was undeniable and he found himself obliging her not long after.

His member twitched as thick wads of his stuff gushed into her, frothy white stuff coating her walls and dripping down his length as more spurted into her. One spurt, two spurt, five spurt, ten filled her, tickling that cervix and making her somehow even wetter. She held his base, giving him encouraging strokes while he unloaded in her, ...maybe even giving his scrotum some soft pinches. As he kept cumming, a deep, tortured groan escaped his lips, a musical accompaniment to his writhing.

“Yep, that’s right,” she inhaled deeply, reaching back to pat his chest ~~and wipe off some of the excess semen that got on her fingers~~ , “there there, let it all out.”

A white river flowed down his privates as he unleashed several more spurts, the twitching final coming to an end with her cunt completely packed with the stuff and the formation of a gooey puddle on the ground. He quieted down, a dazed look in his eyes and his body still. Stretching her arms and pulling her legs back to his sides, she leapt up, a breaking the dam and causing a waterfall between her legs. She purred as she felt herself slowly empty, giving her bare ass a hard slap and sticking one of her cummy fingers into her hole to stir it all up. Her knees locked together and she just had to purr again.

With her fun investigation unfortunately come to a close, she had to return to business as usual. With a great sigh, she waved the goon goodbye, ~~shooting him in the head~~ sending him congratulatory flowers. “Whew! That was productive. I learned a lot.”


End file.
